Here's a joke for you:


Remember:

Laughter is the best medicine!

Unless you're treating diarrhea.











Thursday, March 3, 2016

Let’s do it again!

On March 23rd, at 6:00 pm, I’ll be speaking at the Whitmore Library in Salt Lake.
2197 Fort Union Blvd.
It’s going to be great!
We’re going to tell lots of jokes!
And we’re going to talk about HOW to tell jokes, and how NOT to tell jokes.
We’re going to talk about how proper joke telling can help you improve all the communication you use every day.

Come prepared to participate! We’ll have lots of fun!


“My wife is feeling better after getting her appendix removed. Unfortunately, she will never be able to reference this chapter of her life.”


Wednesday, February 17, 2016

The Joke Telling Seminar was a success!

Everybody had a great time!
I'll be posting video and pictures soon.

Until then,
Here are a few jokes to celebrate the occasion.

Don't repeat this one:

A famous artist was at the height of her career when she began losing her eyesight. She went to a very famous eye doctor for treatment. After a delicate surgery, her eyes began heal and her eyesight improved.
As a demonstration of her thanks, the artist when to the doctor's office and painted a gigantic eye on the wall of the doctor's waiting room.
The press caught wind of the story and wanted to interview the doctor.
"How does this lovely painting in your office make you feel?"
The doctor rubbed his chin and raised an eyebrow.
"It makes me thankful I'm not a gynecologist."
----------------------
A man went to his doctor because he was sick. The doctor did a thorough exam, and when he looked in the man’s ears, he saw dollar bills, folded very small, and stuff neatly in there.
He began to carefully extract the money with a pair of tweezers. First one ear, and then the other. It took more than an hour.
"Do you realize that you had one thousand, nine hundred and ninety-nine dollar bills stuffed in your ears?"
"Ah! That must have been it! I knew I wasn't feeling two grand."
-------------------------
A man went to his doctor and said:
"Doc, can you help me? I can't stop sleepwalking."
The doctor went to a cabinet and took out a small box and gave it to the man.
"Are these sleeping pills?" He asked.

"No, they're tacks. Spread them around on the floor around your bed."


Thursday, February 11, 2016

Welcome Jokers!

Welcome to all who are looking for information about my Joke Seminar coming up on Wednesday the 17th at the Kaysville Library! Be there at 6:00 and bring the family!
Tell all your friends!
Any questions?
Ask away!
And share a joke if you've got one.

If you don't have a joke, we've got plenty here!


Friday, February 5, 2016

Check out my Kindle countdown deal!

Here's a link to visit if you want a DEEPLY discounted copy of my book!

You Must Be Joking!

I'm offering this deal in conjunction with my upcoming talk at the Kaysville Library in Utah, on Feb. 17th at 6:00pm.

It will be LOTS of fun, and there will be LOTS of audience participation.

Tell all your friends!



Also,

Look for the story about my talk in the Davis County Clipper!

Wednesday, February 3, 2016

New jokes for February


What's the best side of the cemetery to live on?
The outside.

--------------------------

Two guys are walking side by side down the street. One of them sees a mirror on the ground, grabs it, looks at it, and says, "This guy looks so familiar, but I can't remember where I know him from."
The other guy grabs it from his hand, takes a look at it, and says, "It's me, you idiot!"

-----------------------------

When is the only time you're justified in slapping your mother in law in the mouth?
When her mustache is on fire.

-----------------------------

My doctor wants me to change my eating habits and try vegetarianism.
But I'm not sure I can give up cold turkey.

-------------------------------

Bill was in his office, struggling with an account. He asked his secretary for some mathematical help.
"If I were to give you $20,000, less 14%, how much would you take off?" he asked her.
The secretary replied, "Everything but my earrings."

---------------------------------

Bob had taken seriously ill. To make things easier on everyone, his bed was moved to a corner of the living room. One evening Bob turned for the worse so Susan sent for friends and relatives to come over and gather around his bed.
Bob: "Susan, are you here?"
Susan: "Yes Bob, I am right here."
Bob: "Stevie, are you here Stevie?"
Stevie: "Yes Dad, I am right here."
Susan: "Bob, we are all here gathered 'round your bed. Here’s Jenny, and here’s your mother."
Bob: "Well, if you're all here; Why is the light on in the kitchen?!"

----------------------------------------

A woman walked into a bar and asked for a double entendre.

So the bartender gave her one.

Sunday, January 24, 2016

If you could learn to tell a joke.

You might think you already can tell a joke.
I guess I understand that. I can play “chopsticks” on the piano, so technically that means that I can play the piano.
But let’s not fight over opinions.
What do you stand to gain if you improve your joke telling skills?
All communication is structured just like a joke. You have a premise, and you have a set up, and you have a payoff. In joke telling we call that a punch line.
Sometimes people tell a joke and it fails. It’s not funny, or the audience doesn’t understand the joke. Why does a joke fail?
The joke teller doesn’t know the joke well. He or she isn’t prepared. The joke teller tries to use too many words. The joke teller doesn’t trust the audience to understand. The joke teller confuses details and muddles the set up.
And finally, the joke teller doesn’t deliver the punch line well. Maybe the joke teller doesn’t really understand the punch line. Maybe the joke teller doesn’t understand the variety of ways the punch line can be delivered. The punch line and even the setup could have been delivered with subtlety, or enthusiasm, or quickly, or slowly, or with seriousness, or with wackiness.
Each joke is deferent, but each joke requires practice, and needs to be delivered with the right mixture of the previously mentioned flavors of delivery. And the joke teller must be very familiar with the joke.
Isn’t this formula the same when you are presenting any kind of information to any kind of group or person?
You need to be familiar with your information.
You need to tell your audience the premise of what you are about to say.
You need to lay out the setup of your information without too many words, and in a manner that your audience can follow and understand.
You must engage your audience with enthusiasm, or seriousness, or speed, or calmness.
And finally, you must deliver your point in a manner that ties everything together and shines a light on the point you are trying to make.

Now, learn to tell a joke, and the next time you’re called upon to deliver another kind of presentation, you’ll have the skills to really make an impact.

And while you're at it, here's a great resource for you:

 http://www.amazon.com/dp/B0175OJZFY



Sunday, January 17, 2016

Upcoming presentation on Joke telling!

Do me a favor and plan on joining with me on February 17th at the Kaysville library in Kaysville Utah, at 6:00 pm for an evening of great jokes and great joke telling instruction!

For those of you outside of the area, the presentation will be filmed and posted as soon after as possible!